Damp Squib at Broadbottom: Rain Saves the Day (for Them)

In a shocking turn of events that has absolutely nothing to do with our batting fragility, the highly anticipated clash against Broadbottom CC was scrubbed from the calendar. We arrived at the ground ready for war, only to find the British weather had other ideas. Frankly, the only thing wetter than the outfield was the disappointment in the eyes of the traveling faithful who had already scoped out the nearest pub. While the scorecard remains as empty as a fast bowler’s head, one cannot help but feel that the elements did Broadbottom a massive favour. Our lads were looking dangerously sharp in the warm-up, or at least they were until the first raindrop hit. It’s a tragic loss for the sport; the world will never know how many classic forward defensives we had stored up for the afternoon. With no wickets to celebrate and no boundaries to cheer, we were forced to settle for the moral victory of being the first ones to the bar. We’ll take the points split and move on, safe in the knowledge that we remain statistically undefeated this week. Rumours that our opening bowlers were relieved to avoid the uphill breeze remain entirely unconfirmed.